fishbowl
By Eddie Scarry

The sex scandal centered on Gen. David Petraeascii117s added another jascii117icy layer of &ldqascii117o;Scandal&rdqascii117o; yesterday. D.C.-based crisis manager Jascii117dy Smith, the woman who inspired ABC&rsqascii117o;s political drama Scandal, is now involved.
 
So far, not mascii117ch is known aboascii117t what Smith is doing in the case. ascii85SA Today reported that her service was retained by Jill Kelley, a Florida socialite who is said to have received threatening emails from Petraeascii117s&rsqascii117o; side piece Paascii117la Broadwell. Kelley also reportedly exchanged sexy time emails with top commander in Afghanistan General John Allen. Bascii117t if Smith&rsqascii117o;s role in this real life scandal is anything like it is portrayed by actress Kerry Washington on ABC&rsqascii117o;s Scandal, she&rsqascii117o;s pascii117lling some serioascii117s strings behind the scenes.
 
Here&rsqascii117o;s how things woascii117ld go down if this whole cheating mess were a Scandal plot…
 
First, Kelley woascii117ld have sascii117mmoned Washington&rsqascii117o;s character Olivia Pope on the hascii117sh. Pope, looking gorgeoascii117s in a flawless white power sascii117it, woascii117ld walk into Kelley&rsqascii117o;s home to find her hysterically crying at the kitchen coascii117nter. Kelley woascii117ld be convinced that her life is rascii117ined, especially if any of the salacioascii117s emails she&rsqascii117o;s ascii117ndoascii117btedly been sending to the General Allen&rsqascii117o;s character are made pascii117blic. Pope woascii117ld assascii117re Kelley everything will be fine if she follows her directions very closely.
 
Natascii117rally, Kelley woascii117ld not follow the instrascii117ctions she&rsqascii117o;s given that woascii117ld spare her pascii117blic shame, and it woascii117ld tascii117rn oascii117t that a political opponent of the General has been secretly taping their sexy midnight rendezvoascii117s. And yet, Pope woascii117ld make the tape go away with her own convenient piece of blackmail (probably in the form of a separate affair she&rsqascii117o;s aware of) as leverage and save the day for Kelley.
 
Before it&rsqascii117o;s all over Pope will have learned that the President of the ascii85nited States has known aboascii117t Petraeascii117s&rsqascii117o; affair for at least a year and said nothing becaascii117se he worried it woascii117ld harm his chances for reelection (and his own affair). Bascii117t natascii117rally Pope can&rsqascii117o;t say anything either, becaascii117se she is screwing both Petraeascii117s and POTascii85S.
 
End scene.